Yesterday, I was all effusive about Summer Solstice and how nice it was to be able to ride to work in shorts and short sleeves. So of course I was rewarded with a rainy commute home, and what looks like a storm brewing on the way in today. Not to mention the fact that it’s once again cold enough that I had to wear tights and a long sleeve jersey on the way in.

Grrrr.

Still, the weather was decent enough that I got up early and had a good ride before heading out to work. Issaquah / Fall City Road is my new favorite road in the whole world.

Here, Have Another Eclair

Yesterday, my manager at work (hi, Matt!) said he’s interested in getting a road bike. So for lunch, we went to the closest bike shop and looked around. Amazing what you can get for <$600 now. Then he said he’d buy me lunch at a Malaysian restaraunt as a birthday present. Mmmm, chicken curry. Afterward, fat and happy, I felt like I was ready for a nice little nap.

Then, when I got home last night, my nine-year-old son had out pretzels and Cool Whip. Now, before you wrinkle up your nose, please consider that dipping pretzels into Cool Whip is a brilliant and simple study in complementary foods:

• Pretzels are salty, Cool Whip is sweet
• Pretzels are crunchy and rough, Cool Whip is fluffy and smooth
• Pretzels are room temperature, Cool Whip is…well…cool
• Pretzels are a baked simple carbohydrate, Cool Whip is a completely synthetic mix of chemicals not found in nature, which manages, ironically, to be colored as pure as the driven snow. How many food coloring additives do you suppose it takes to make something pure white?

These complementing contrasts underscore and augment each other, making for an irresistable taste treat that the whole family can enjoy. How could I not eat a half bag of pretzels and half tub of Cool Whip? I guess we’ll never know, because I did.

And that’s when it hit me: people I know — my manager, my son — are trying to sabotage my weight loss efforts, in a transparent and nefarious plot to collect on the Fat Cyclist Sweepstakes! Well, now I’m on to your little plot, and I will defeat you! After I have a few more of those pretzels with Cool Whip.

All of which leads up to…

Today’s Weight: 174.6. I’m headed back in the right direction, but I have to be vigilant. Obviously, there are ne’er-do-wells who would love to see me fail.