Permanent Statement
Yesterday, I talked about getting a rookie mark tattoo, as a permanent acknowledgment that I am a permanent rookie. I always reconsider, though, thinking that it’s not something I’ll necessarily think is quite so hilarious when I’m living in a nursing home.
That, however, is not the only tattoo I have thought about for my calf. For years, I have privately promised myself that if I finish the Leadville 100 in under nine hours, I will tattoo my finishing time and the year I did it on my right calf, for all the world to see. Because that is something I’m pretty sure I’d be happy to talk about forever (whether I was asked to or not).
Since this year is pretty much my make-or-break year for getting that sub-9 time, maybe we’ll see if I follow through. I think I would.
Sure, I’d be laughed at for the rest of my life for getting my first tattoo at 40, the age at which most people finally know better and are looking into getting those tattoos they got at age 19 removed.
But I’d still wear it proudly.
Banjo Brothers Weekly Bike Bag Giveaway Question
What bike-related tattoo would you get, where, and why? Or better yet, what bike-related tattoo have you already got? Where and why? Bonus points if you’ve got a photo; email it to me: fatty@fatcyclist.com.
Oh, and by the way, congrats to the Banjo Brothers for getting some serious airtime on a local news program. Check it out here.
Today’s weight: 169.0
Comment by Jsun | 02.22.2006 | 6:58 pm
The best bike related tattoo might not even look like a tattoo.
It’d be great if I could get my muscles shaded and outlined to accentuate their giganticness (or hide their flabbiness). I’d kinda like my ‘abs’ accentuated with shading to give the appearance of a six pack. While we are sitting there getting new ink, why not add some definition to my arms and legs too. Having them inked versus working out would be similar in pain, but the lifetime benefits of a single session would far outweigh the endless hours i could spend trying to maintain my piddly physique.
my favorie bike tattoo emailed to you…
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 7:34 pm
How about "STUPID" across my forehead, for when I started my sprint a lap early on a crit, or when I caused the bunch to crash due to my careless riding. There are just too many examples to list. Maybe in my book, "Memoirs Of A Dumb-Ass Cyclist", I could retell the tales…
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 8:17 pm
If you get a sub nine at Leadville this year I will tattoo your name and time on my calf.
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 8:24 pm
I’ve got a good idea, but I can’t really be bothered to post them on your blog. So if you can tell me how, Fatty, I think I’ll just mail it in today.
Comment by Tim D | 02.22.2006 | 8:45 pm
It is a tradition in triathlon circles to have the Ironman logo with the flag of the country in which you complete your first Ironman. I would love to earn the right to one of these tatoos, but can’t be bothered actually training for one.
Cheers
Tim
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 8:51 pm
i’d get one with me lying on my back in cycling gear with those funny black x’s like the kind on the dead guys from the old timey talkies, with my bike on top of me. the subcript would read: "may he never bonk again, god rest his soul."
Comment by tayfuryagci | 02.22.2006 | 9:57 pm
I’d get one on my shoulders: "BIKE and DESTROY"
it just sounds mighty cool
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 10:01 pm
i would get a smaller butt tatooed on my butt.
Comment by BIg Mike In Oz | 02.22.2006 | 10:11 pm
Both of my planned tattoo’s are about my family. Since Jamie Staff stole my idea. http://www.cyclingnews.com/photos/2004/may04/WTC04/?id=day3/SGdsc_2466
Comment by Savvas | 02.22.2006 | 10:46 pm
I believe that this is the tattoo that you would love to have but are too chicken to actually get: Check out some more Campagnolo related tattoos! I have been thinking the last years to get the old Campy logo (with the two wings) on my right ankle… yeah I chicken out too…
Comment by Savvas | 02.22.2006 | 10:59 pm
sorry for the double post…
This is the picture I’m talking about just below: http://www.campyonly.com/images/legtattoo.gif
Comment by nick | 02.22.2006 | 11:17 pm
Easy, Phil Liggert on my stomach, so that when i stand up and the roll flattens out a balloon shows coming out of his mouth saying "Lance Armstrong"
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 11:18 pm
If I ever have the chance to meet Jan Ulrich I would ask him to autograph my lower back and then I would have it tattooed.
Comment by nick | 02.22.2006 | 11:19 pm
Forgot to add my name to the Phil Liggert tat, of course, if my stomach was bigger i could always add Paul Sherwin as my finances improve.
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 11:31 pm
I had back surgery about 18 months ago, and my recovery was due in a large part to starting cycling again after about 15 years off. Recently, I have developed an interested in single speeds, and am in the process of converting my old MB-4 bridgestone to a single speed. The tattoo I have been thinking about would cover up my scar, and be a single speed gear chainring & cog (probably 36-18 since that’s what would be on my bike) connected with a chain. It would be vertical with the large chainring on the top and the smaller cog on the bottom, the whole deal about 3 inches long. If anyone can do a drawing for me, let me know!
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 11:31 pm
I had back surgery about 18 months ago, and my recovery was due in a large part to starting cycling again after about 15 years off. Recently, I have developed an interested in single speeds, and am in the process of converting my old MB-4 bridgestone to a single speed. The tattoo I have been thinking about would cover up my scar, and be a single speed gear chainring & cog (probably 36-18 since that’s what would be on my bike) connected with a chain. It would be vertical with the large chainring on the top and the smaller cog on the bottom, the whole deal about 3 inches long. If anyone can do a drawing for me, let me know!
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 11:35 pm
Right Cheek: OS
Right Leg: Body
Left Leg: Luxury
Left Cheek: ASS
Now, if only I could sell it as true.
Comment by Unknown | 02.22.2006 | 11:39 pm
I’m still not stupid enough to get a tatoo of any sort, for any reason, on any part of my body. I might get there someday, but not today. I mean, they might use the tatoo to identify me after I rob a liquor store and race away on my bike. How stupid would that be, to have a tatoo and get caught because of it? Nope, keep it clean, that’s my motto.
Comment by Unknown | 02.23.2006 | 12:33 am
bradley, what if you could get a tattoo with invisible ink?
Botched
Comment by Andrew | 02.23.2006 | 3:26 am
How ’bout "BIKE NEKKED" tattoo’d on the small of my back? Sorry, no one around here would photo it so I could email it to you.
Comment by BIg Mike In Oz | 02.23.2006 | 10:34 am
This may be a little too extreme depending on how uncoordinated the rider is but how about putting "That’s gotta hurt" adjacent to every broken bone or set of stitches caused by cycling.
My count would be 6 (or 7. If 1 bone is broken in 2 places at the same time does that count as 1 or 2?).
Comment by Unknown | 02.23.2006 | 11:01 am
Back of the neck, in all caps, a nice typewriter font:
"If you can read this, back the hell off!"
Would make a nice change of pace; I could shout "Can’t you read!?" at the drivers instead of just swearing really loud. Grin.
Comment by Unknown | 02.23.2006 | 4:55 pm
probably Banjo Brothers, or something like
that. buttkisser, what? brown-nose,huh?
Comment by barry1021 | 02.23.2006 | 6:04 pm
As much as I covet a win in the Thursday Giveaway, any thought that draws attention to my body will instantly put anyone who knows me, including yours truly, in hurl mode, so I have no suggestions to offer on a tattoo. However if you will indulge me for a minute–last weekend was my first ride on my new fixie!! I would like to thank FC and all the others who wax poetic on fixed gears, and who inspired me to take the plunge. I have ridden it several times in ss mode but it was time to go for it and reverse the wheel and go fixie. Other than the expected occasion when I was almost thrown over the handlebars, it was quite delightful. Now here is the revelation I had (that cleverly and seamlessly connects to a previous FC blog)–I was going along smoothly for several miles when I became aware that I was singing "I got rhythm, I got good times, I got my girl, who could ask for anything more?" over and over again. Not only is this song not in my universe, I probably have not heard it in over 40 years. And thus the revelation–its the bike that determines what song plays in your head!! My theory is that the bike serves as some sort of receiver, capturing songs that are either transmitted by some intergalactic force of evil or the Amaury Sports Organisation, the owners of L’Equipe and sponsors of the Tour De France (one in the same??). The song is than transmitted to the rider’s tooth fillings and into the brain. As proof, I bet everyone who complained of songs that they could not get out of their head has fillings, yes? AHA!!! You can see I am very excited about discovering this, and as soon as I complete my thesis on Who Shot Kennedy and prove that Tom Cruise is an alien, I intend to devote full attention to this. Sorry to digress, now back to regularly scheduled events….
B21
Comment by jim | 02.23.2006 | 6:06 pm
I would like to have a life-size tatoo of myself except a few inches smaller in the gut. I know that is not a cycling tat but I still think it would be cool.
Comment by Unknown | 02.23.2006 | 6:59 pm
Bradley, don’t sell yourself short, Pal.
Comment by Unknown | 02.23.2006 | 9:33 pm
I’ve been tempted to get an Ironman tattoo (if race IM Australia twice) but have chickened out. Maybe next time !
Comment by Nanget | 02.23.2006 | 10:05 pm
"Burn fat, not oil" many years ago i saw a hippie type racer with that tattooed on his bicep.
Comment by Shari | 02.23.2006 | 10:40 pm
I would like to get the design for the Iron Creek Lake Old Baldy Hammer Jam tatooed on my lower back… in color, even. Why? Because it looks awesome!
Comment by Teresa | 02.24.2006 | 1:23 am
Caloi-rider,
I agree that it is a cool looking design for a tattoo. I have seen men with it tattooed on their arms as a way to let others know that they are HIV positive.
For my tattoo, which truthfully would have nothing to do with cycling, would be an infinity symbol; the mathematical symbol, not the one for the car.
Comment by Zed | 02.24.2006 | 2:11 am
Contessa, thanks for that educational moment.
Fatty, I hereby withdraw my comment. It no longer looks cool. In fact, it’s downright frightening.
Comment by k | 02.24.2006 | 5:20 am
hmm. how timely. I’ve recently gotten the tattoo bug again, and have been trying to pin down my whats and wheres. I think it’s going to be some sort of freakishly morphed bike chain / girly floral thing around my upper calf–just under my knee. If I ever get it designed and find the right artist (suggestions for such in the Phx area welcome!), I’ll send you proof. :D
Comment by David | 02.24.2006 | 5:51 am
On a pretty rippin descent, our team captain at Carolina
Fatz (fat tires) got caught up in a rain gulley along the side of the fire road
and ran smack into a mini-boulder concealed by some leaves. He went flyyying,
without a pilot’s license it seems or any real training in personal aviation because
the flight was erratic and the landing was of the classic crash and burn
variety. A broken scapula and a trip to the emergency room ensued. He said the
doctors were going to cut him to set the bone or something… I forget. With
typical mtb sentiments, he told the team that he would tattoo the likeness of a
gnarly biker dude descending down the left over scar on his back after he
healed up. I never did see the outcome but I thought it was a good idea and would
be a fun story to recount years down the road.
Comment by Unknown | 02.24.2006 | 2:12 pm
Last summer I broke my wrist after a nasty road-variety endo (don’t ask). The repair required surgery, two titanium plates and 9 screws (worth considerably more than my bike). I awoke from recovery to find that the surgeon had left me a cool souvenir – - an <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/34825213@N00/103786839/" >x-ray</a> of the permanent addition he’d made to my right wrist.
My ultimate scar-site tattoo would outline this titanium infrastructure. Not only a great conversation starter, but I imagine it would be handy at airport check points as well.
BTW, I discovered your blog during the endless hours I spent doing physical therapy and have been an adoring (although silent) reader since then. I was off the bike for two agonizing months.
Comment by Unknown | 02.24.2006 | 3:46 pm
Mine would say "wheee!"