The Jell-O Chronicles
I am surprised — so very, very surprised — that after yesterday’s post, not one single person commented what I considered to be a very obvious flaw in my assertion that I would never consider actually eating nothing but Sugar-Free Jell-O for a day
The lie in that assertion is right there in the image: If you’re not planning to eat a whole bunch of Jell-O, why do you have so much Jell-O?
Slackers.
It should be no surprise, then — especially now — that I hereby declare today “Nothing but Jell-O Day.”
Thank You For Your Concern
When I coyly speculated on what I was — as you in retrospect realize — obviously intending to do, a number of you expressed concerns. These concerns are, as I recall:
- Jell-O is gross. I concede this point. The “jell” in Jell-O comes from, as near as I can tell, from pig hooves, cattle tendons, rat claws, and ground-up snail shells. I have known this all my my life. It doesn’t bother me. I’m a product of my environment, I suppose.
- Sugar-Free Jell-O is poisonous. It’s got aspartame, which is bad. I concede the probability of this, but the truth is, as a consumer of vast quantities of Diet Coke every single day, any harm I incur from a day of gorging on Sugar-Free Jell-O is going to be incremental. Besides, I like to live dangerously.
- This diet is not sustainable. That’s true. I will do this for one day, and one day only.
- The packaging is wasteful. Yes, it is. And ordinarily I would have just bought the powder and mixed this up myself. But I really, really wanted to make a Jell-O cup pyramid. A photo of a big bowl full of Jell-O just wouldn’t have been dramatic enough for me.
- You’ll shoot your eye out, kid. OK, nobody actually said that, but I think it’s always a valid concern.
Why?
The question you should be asking yourself about this day of Sugar-Free Jell-O consumption is: “Why?” Why would I do such a thing?
I have many reasons, each better than the previous, but not quite as good as the next.
- The blog must be fed. It’s been months since I’ve been out on a biking adventure. All of my riding currently happens early in the morning, in the spare bedroom, on rollers. Which is not exactly the best source of new material that has ever existed. So yes, I’m stretching here. Demand a refund if you feel you’re entitled to one.
- I need to draw a line in the sand. I don’t want to go into serious stuff today, but the truth is that with my life the way it is right now, I’m having a hard time sticking to a smart “sensible eating” diet. I hope to reboot my eating habits by doing some absurd stuff for a few days, and then switching to the much more reasonable kind of diet I know works if I’m willing to be disciplined. This is, in a way, a starting gun.
- Jell-O is delicious.
- I’ve got to do something with all this Jell-O. Hey, I’ve got 42 packets of Jell-O here. They’re taking up fridge space.
- I weigh 186.4 pounds. Something must be done, before the season begins.
Caveats and Problems
As I eat nothing but Jell-O today, I’m acutely aware that there will be difficulties. Here are some of the problems I expect:
- Cumulative disgust with texture: I like Jell-O, but if there’s one thing that endurance cycling has taught me, it’s that one continuous texture for all your food gets pretty old, pretty fast. Oddly, this does not seem to hold true for breakfast cereal, which I could happily eat all day, every day.
- Cumulative disgust with sweetness: If there’s another thing that endurance cycling has taught me, it’s that I get sick of sweet food when that’s all I eat. Sadly, as far as I know, Jell-O does not yet come in nacho or burrito flavors. Alas.
- This stuff is expensive. These little Jell-O packets cost just under $0.50 each. If, as I ridiculously posited yesterday, I were to try to consume 1500 calories worth of Jell-O, I would have also consumed $75.00 worth of Jell-O. Also, I know for sure that the grocery store doesn’t have that much. Luckily for me, I can go back to the store and buy the much more reasonably-priced powder form. But honestly, I have a hard time imagining me eating more than the stock I’ve got.
- Outrageous hunger. I’ve gotten by on less than 500 calories in a day before. However, I’ve never gotten by on that when I’m also taking care of the kids and Susan. I can’t just slouch around and be grumpy today. I’ve got responsibilities, much as if I were an adult. So I’m giving myself a caveat: I can also eat bananas today. I know, I know: that kind of kills the drama of the event. I apologize.
First in a Series
I intend to do several “Nothing But…” days in a row.
- Today, Jell-O.
- Tomorrow, spaghetti.
- Friday: fruit.
- Monday: we’ll see.
The Day So Far
10:30am: 5 packs (3 red, 2 green), 1 banana. I feel fine, though I usually don’t eat a big breakfast anyway.
11:45am 5 packs (2 orange, 2 green, 1 red), 1 banana. This made only a minor dent in my hunger. I plan to have more in an hour or so.
1:15pm 3 packs (1 lime, 1 orange, 1 red), 1 banana. I’m incredibly disappointed in myself, because I seem to have already hit my gag threshold. See, I intended to eat 6 packs; I felt the gorge rising by the time I was into my second. In fact, I ate the third just to show it who’s boss.
Is it really possible that my Jell-O Tolerance Threshold (J-OTT) is so low?
Meanwhile, I am hungry.
Comment by SDM | 02.25.2009 | 12:54 pm
you know you have to eat it all with a straw, right?
Comment by Carl | 02.25.2009 | 12:55 pm
You are a sometimes funny, sometimes thought provoking, sometimes both kind of guy – but obviously you’re not entirely all “there”. Do you think your belly will jiggle at the end of the day?
Comment by monkeywebb | 02.25.2009 | 12:58 pm
Along with the color of the individual cups, I would appreciate your rough estimate of the combined color. Don’t forget to include the banana.
I’m thinking this weekend I’m going to commit to a “nothing but” diet. My pantry reveals a plentiful stock of spaghetti sauce, but no pasta. Sounds like a pretty nutritious liquid diet. I like the thought of downing spaghetti sauce shooters while on a ride.
Comment by db | 02.25.2009 | 12:58 pm
After an all-fruit Friday, you will need your own bathroom.
Comment by chtrich | 02.25.2009 | 12:58 pm
I’d be happy to join you in your “Nothing But” day tomorrow, but I’ll have to pass on your Jell-O attempt today.
Best wishes to you though!
Comment by chtrich | 02.25.2009 | 12:59 pm
186.4!……desperate times do call for desperate measures!
Comment by Sylvie | 02.25.2009 | 1:05 pm
Well my roommate was looking over my shoulder last night when I read your blog and she did ask why you had so much jello… I just didn’t comment.
Comment by Patrick | 02.25.2009 | 1:08 pm
Are you going to weigh yourself at the end of the day?
Comment by BurkeInTheOzarks | 02.25.2009 | 1:14 pm
This should be fun. For us. Not you. Definitely not you.
I do, however, disagree that using powder would not be entertaining. You just need to use one huge glass bowl so that it can all be mixed up as one batch. Combine all colors/flavors and throw in whole bananas. Now that’s a picture worth framing. You could then take pictures of the bowl throughout the day as you whittle it down to empty.
Comment by Nathan | 02.25.2009 | 1:15 pm
My favorite part is that you are almost live blogging this ‘event’.
How many times today should I refresh your main page?
Comment by Annie | 02.25.2009 | 1:15 pm
I can’t believe you’re doing this. How disgusting. I’ve never eaten jello, and I’m pretty sure that’s the direct result of my sister jiggling a Jello egg in front of me… food that moves … on its own? Well, not on its own, but it keeps moving after you leave it alone. Nasty!
Comment by WheelDancer | 02.25.2009 | 1:16 pm
Well Fatty, I’m glad you still have your shit together and that this isn’t in preparation for a colonoscopy. I’m not sure what you are proposing is much better…
Comment by bikesgonewild | 02.25.2009 | 1:21 pm
…bill cosby is coming by @ 3:00pm for an intervention…
…please, fatty, listen to him…he’s concerned…
Comment by Jim | 02.25.2009 | 1:22 pm
>>>This is, in a way, a starting gun.
Actual guns are a great way to stop your overeating immediately, but they tend to crimp your ability to eat healthy in the future.
Comment by Bitter (formerly known as Lissee) | 02.25.2009 | 1:23 pm
HA! So a new version of The Stunt Diet™ begins again!!
Happy Day.
Comment by MommyAmy | 02.25.2009 | 1:26 pm
Oh my goodness!
Well, I’m glad you’re also eating bananas. At least you’ll get SOME nutrition today.
I wonder what color your tongue will be by the end of the day…
Comment by Forestvillian | 02.25.2009 | 1:31 pm
“My prediction?… Pain”.
And my wife would have reenacted a Gallagher sledgehammer on my SD card if I published a picture with her bent over in the background.
And I think I could do orange, cherry and any of the puddings, but not green.
Comment by Forestvillian | 02.25.2009 | 1:32 pm
Whoa.. That’s the blue chair!! Holy crap is that embarassing..
The top right of the chair looks like a pair of legs with a blue sweater..
So sorry…
Comment by Mikeonhisbike | 02.25.2009 | 1:35 pm
Holy Cow Fatty, that’s out of control. I’ve got a recipe for whole wheat banana pancakes on my blog this morning. Maybe you should add those to your Tuesday commando diet. That should counteract all of that jello.
Mike J
Comment by Weiland | 02.25.2009 | 1:35 pm
Glad to see you are doing your part to make sure Utah is the Jello capital of the world.
Comment by Woody | 02.25.2009 | 1:37 pm
I’ll join you on the spaghetti day. But Jello? No way!!
Comment by buckythedonkey | 02.25.2009 | 1:47 pm
> I weigh 186.4 pounds.
OK, so how tall are you, Buddy? I’m trying to figure out whether or not to get cross about you being so damned light.
Despite all that…
…WIN SUSAN!!
Comment by graisseux | 02.25.2009 | 1:50 pm
Wow, 21 comments so far and no one has self-righteously tsk-tsked you for such an unhealthy approach to weight loss. I’d tsk-tsk you myself, but I’m not the tsk-tsking kind.
Comment by sharon | 02.25.2009 | 1:53 pm
when my kids eat cake with all that food colored icing, it turns their poop different colors- I think Jello will do the same- just my hypothesis for your little experiment-enjoy, but please don’t post pics :)
Comment by DOM | 02.25.2009 | 2:01 pm
Oh, Fat One, you underestimate your loyal readers. Many comments obviously refer to our acceptance that, of course, you intended to eat all of the Jello. One commenter opened the door for the use of a blow torch as in the microwaved Cliff blocks, but most of us saw you going to your “old school diet” ways.
We didn’t ask the question because we already knew the answer. Those of us who have been around long enough to remember this dietary scheme were just waiting to read the race report. If Jello and bananas don’t cause you to race through the house, I’m pretty sure all fruit Friday will.
Comment by John | 02.25.2009 | 2:03 pm
I’m disappointed with you. Having bananas on a nothing but Jello day is not a “Nothing but Jello” day :-( Good luck with the rest of the day.
Comment by Jeff | 02.25.2009 | 2:06 pm
I hope you have a magic toilet.
Comment by Hat | 02.25.2009 | 2:14 pm
You’ll burn off what calories you consume using the plunger.
Comment by Anonymous | 02.25.2009 | 2:15 pm
When I was first diagnosed with diabetes, I was 13, and i spent about 5 days in the hospital. Having dropped from 120lbs to 90lbs over the six weeks leading up to my diagnosis as an already thin 13 year old, when my blood sugar came back under control, I became incredibly hungry. The only snacks I could eat in the hospital had to be low/no carb, which meant little hospital salads and sugar-free jello. I ate at least 8-10 jello cups a day for the 5 days i was there. Strangely, I still don’t mind the taste of jello.
Comment by Den | 02.25.2009 | 2:23 pm
“I hope to reboot my eating habits by doing some absurd stuff for a few days”
Ummm, Elden, if you eat all that jello, something’s going to be rebooted. And for the sake of your family, I hope you don’t use the makeshift bathroom in the living room…
Good luck!
Comment by Shelly in Austin | 02.25.2009 | 2:23 pm
Fascinated by the “nothing but Jello” day! Highly concerned about the “nothing but fruit” day! Please exercise blogging discretion during that time. I get enough potty updates from my four year old!
Comment by Aaron | 02.25.2009 | 2:31 pm
I like Jell-O. I think I could eat that much of it. And I think Utah is also the Diet Coke capital of the world. Everyone I know from Utah, drinks lots of it.
Comment by Garmon | 02.25.2009 | 2:33 pm
If your gag reflex gets too strong, throw a bunch in a blender and puree them, then chug the results. Or is that cheating??
Comment by Hat | 02.25.2009 | 2:45 pm
Wonderful. A live blog about nausea.
Comment by MOCougFan | 02.25.2009 | 2:46 pm
Man this whopper is good
Comment by Michael in TN | 02.25.2009 | 2:46 pm
Go Fatty! Jell-ostrong!
Oh, and don’t forget to close the bathroom door when the inevitable happens. We all remember “the incident” with the nurse.
Comment by MOCougFan | 02.25.2009 | 2:47 pm
Hey dug… you might want to update Elden on Poopy Procedures.
Comment by Michael in TN | 02.25.2009 | 2:52 pm
P.S. You must have feelings of great power knowing that you have people actually following your liveblogging about how much jell-o you can eat in a day. Must be quite consuming.
Comment by Mike Roadie | 02.25.2009 | 3:02 pm
Oh…..we ALL miss the ATOC, don’t we????
Comment by Anonymous | 02.25.2009 | 3:05 pm
In about 40 days, can I join you for a Nothing but Oreos Day? I gave them up for Lent. Your hair and nails will be incredibly healthy at the end of all this – your GI tract, not so much.
Comment by gus | 02.25.2009 | 3:09 pm
You only weigh 186? How tall are you? You may not be a Fat Cyclist. I am 5′4″ and weigh 192. My saving grace is that I am muscular and have a 48″ chest. Otherwise I would be an obese cyclist.
Comment by Ethan | 02.25.2009 | 3:11 pm
Keep it up!
Comment by allison | 02.25.2009 | 3:22 pm
Is it really that difficult to subsist on jello alone for a day??
Someone else try it, because I ride too much to not eat a variety of food ;)
Comment by TexasTailwind | 02.25.2009 | 3:27 pm
I’ve often considering doing the same challenge, but with ClifBars . . . for a week
Comment by Rachel | 02.25.2009 | 3:29 pm
Well, really, you would be hungry no matter what you were eating, since you’re dieting. That is, if you’re not overeating. At least that’s the way it feels around here.
Is that motivating or what!
Comment by jenjen | 02.25.2009 | 3:32 pm
I love the pyramid, Elden. It’s a work of art! Good luck with your jello diet….
Comment by Linda | 02.25.2009 | 3:33 pm
sugar free jello is the only food that got me through the south beach diet a couple years ago…it is considered dessert.
Comment by Speedbuggy | 02.25.2009 | 3:45 pm
Totally reminds me of the contest in college. We could only eat twinkies, for a week.
We could drink what we wanted, but no solid foods except Twinkies.
Suffice it to say it was gross, but I didn’t eat that many Twinkies. I stuck to the liquid diet and lost weight.
People who say its dangerous, unhealthy, blah blah blah I say things like, people ingest far worse things for far longer and are fine.
Like you said its a day (or in my case a week) so, once that time is done you go have a huge bucket of fruits n veggies n life is back to normal.
Enjoy the fruits of your labor kind sir.
Comment by k-berg | 02.25.2009 | 3:59 pm
we decided to just eat chips n salsa n beer all weekend in college. worked out ok
Comment by Erin | 02.25.2009 | 4:02 pm
Don’t be too hard on yourself. My J-OTT kicks in when I get within five feet of the stuff.
Comment by KanyonKris | 02.25.2009 | 4:03 pm
Elden, I’m with DOM, give us some credit – we all assumed you’d be eating them. Why else show them?
And what’s with the bananas? That’s not Jell-O. I want my money back.
I hope you’re keeping careful notes to advance (non)nutritional science.
Comment by Philly Jen | 02.25.2009 | 4:04 pm
Wow, your house has now become an official branch of JPL (the Jell-O Propulsion Laboratory).
Watch it wiggle, see it jiggle…
Comment by Clydesteve | 02.25.2009 | 4:10 pm
bananas? slacker.
Comment by jayzen | 02.25.2009 | 4:14 pm
Sound like this is going to be no problem until the reality starts creeping in. If you do a weight loss challenge, I would participate. Imagine if you were not eating the bananas…
Comment by Jouni | 02.25.2009 | 4:29 pm
Wow…here’s one thing I can cross off my to-do list. Thanks Elden, for taking this on. :D
Comment by bikesgonewild | 02.25.2009 | 4:32 pm
…is this jell-o diet intended to heighten your psychic abilities so you can “see through” & help dave z recover his ’stuff’ ???…
Comment by Mike | 02.25.2009 | 4:36 pm
Wait! I think I know why you’re still haven’t a hard time losing weight!
“[...] as a consumer of vast quantities of Diet Coke every single day”
Yeah, that’s a pretty big waste of cash right there. You know the experts have proved that stuff doesn’t help anyone lose weight, right?
P.S. For heaven’s sake, man, eat some REAL FOOD already!!!!
Comment by Mike | 02.25.2009 | 4:37 pm
whoops. I just realized my comment doesn’t make sense.
Here, let’s fix that sentence:
“I think I know why you’re still having a hard time losing weight!”
Comment by Marianne | 02.25.2009 | 4:40 pm
I note there haven’t been any updates since this afternoon – how are you feeling? You’re not in the emergency room with aspartame seizures, are you?
Comment by Bitter (formerly known as Lissee) | 02.25.2009 | 4:40 pm
So sorry to hear that the gag reflex is starting to factor in. …
Comment by gtrain | 02.25.2009 | 4:45 pm
There’s no such thing as J-OTT because we all know ..”There’s Always Room For JELL-O©”
Comment by MOCougFan | 02.25.2009 | 4:45 pm
Hate to inform you of this, but if your eating bananas with your Jell-o only diet, its not a Jello only diet.
Gonna have to cut the bananas out tomorrow and start over. Sorry brother.
Comment by snobound | 02.25.2009 | 4:56 pm
Don’t feel bad Fatty. I just started the South Beach diet – because I look like a beached whale. I think S/F Jell-o is scrumptious. Although I must confess that I’m hallucinating from hunger…have been for 3 days now. Oh look….a multi-vitamin…..
Comment by Kt | 02.25.2009 | 5:20 pm
Hey! False advertising, Fats! You should say it’s a Nothin’ but Jell-O and a banana with each meal Day.
That’s too long to say, though.
Is that Bill Cosby I hear knockin’?
Comment by fatty | 02.25.2009 | 5:27 pm
mike – i know diet coke doesn’t help me lose weight. but i also know it tastes good.
Comment by kid dynomite | 02.25.2009 | 5:31 pm
…thats an interesting concept> each day 1 food group is emphasized>>jello monday,fruit tues,veggies wed. etc…by the end of the week …it all works out..you could be onto something big .
Comment by Orbea Girl | 02.25.2009 | 5:38 pm
When I read yesterday’s Jell-O post I never, for one moment, thought you would really eat it. But you are, aren’t you? Or are you? Frankly, I feel ill just thinking about all that Jell-O, never mind eating any of it. How did you come to have so much in your store cupboard?
Comment by Banger | 02.25.2009 | 5:47 pm
I recommend an all split peas soup day. At least if you are looking for some alone time.
Comment by Erine | 02.25.2009 | 5:55 pm
Um, yuck. For some reason all the bad LDS jokes involving Jello and family home evening are ALL coming back to me in one fell swoop. Thanks.
Comment by Amber | 02.25.2009 | 6:03 pm
I recommend making Jell-O shots… they are much more entertaining than plain Jell-O. ;)
Comment by Michael in TN | 02.25.2009 | 6:18 pm
You should twitter everytime you eat a jell-o, just like how lance twitters everytime he moves.
Comment by Darby Shaw | 02.25.2009 | 6:29 pm
JELLO IS PEOPLE!
Comment by LindaLoo | 02.25.2009 | 6:49 pm
Oh my Fatty, not only are you hungry- you are kooked! (and funny!)
Comment by bikemike | 02.25.2009 | 6:49 pm
again, i say…video please!
Comment by Elizabeth Rein | 02.25.2009 | 7:34 pm
Michael in TN: Ha! Too funny!
Comment by Kala | 02.25.2009 | 9:19 pm
Fatty, I laughed the entire way through this. Sometimes when I get tired of the consistency of Jell-o I put some in my mouth and swish it around like mouthwash… It makes it a different consistency! I remember when I was a kid they used to make Squeeze-its (fruit drink in a squueze-able bottle=awesome) but then they had ones that had like… jell-o in them. It was very weird… but if you swish jell-o around in your mouth then it is exactly the same as these jell-o-ish Squeeze-its. I know this is probably too late in the day, but if you ever need to choke down obscene amounts of jell-o again, you can remember that hint!
Comment by Peter | 02.25.2009 | 9:20 pm
What I love is that while I was reading about your jello feeding frenzy, a Whataburger ad was teasing me at the bottom of your post. Almost to say: “Eaten nothing but Jello all day? Come have a Whataburger!”
So, follow up all those jellos with a pint of warm gatorade and…y’know, see what happens.
Comment by BikeCopVT | 02.25.2009 | 9:25 pm
Is anybody else concerned that Elden didn’t post after 1:15. Oops, just noticed a post around 5:00 but no update on the Jello status. There is a whole lot of unaccounted for Jello eating time there. Is the Jello wiggling inside your stomach some how preventing you from typing? I hope you are ok Fatty.
Win Susan
Elden Won!
LiveStrong!!
Comment by DrewDD | 02.25.2009 | 9:48 pm
I’m with BikeCop, I fear this means the jello concentrate in his stomach achieved critical density and formed a new strain of life. Then it began nibbling at the walls of its enclosure . . .
Comment by Scrod | 02.25.2009 | 10:20 pm
I hope he has plenty of chamois cream on hand. I think he will be riding porcelain most of the day tomorrow and he doesn’t want to chafe. Ick.
Comment by bikesgonewild | 02.25.2009 | 11:01 pm
…i think amber @ 6:03pm is onto something…
…jell-o shots…now, how many of “those” can you do in a day ???…
…actually, i’m sure the results of that would prove it to be an experiment gone awry…
Comment by Rabbit | 02.25.2009 | 11:26 pm
What’s with the banana!!!!!!! I thought it was a nothing but Jell-o day.
C’mon Fatty be true to the cause…..what ever that is!
If you eat your banana’s today you won’t have any for fruit day.
Cheers Rabbit
Ps How about a carrot day, it’s gotta be good for you!!
Comment by Kathleen | 02.26.2009 | 12:07 am
Good luck. You’re gonna need it my friend.
Comment by Triflefat | 02.26.2009 | 12:23 am
See where that evil Chipotle card has brought you to?
Days of gastronomical torture.
For your health’s sake, man, send me the Chipotle card. I’ll make sure it can never again work its wicked ways with your waistline.
Comment by Dobovedo | 02.26.2009 | 12:59 am
I saw no reason to ask why you have so much jello. By now I’ve learned to expect nearly anything you come up with to blog about to be so weird it seems perfectly normal.
A more appropriate question would have been, “what happened to the rest of the Jello?” It obviously didn’t come in a 39 pack!
Comment by buckythedonkey | 02.26.2009 | 5:47 am
From today’s Cycling Weekly (UK magazine): an expert’s advice on the subject getting over a cold includes this gem:
“Try to eat dry, bland foods like toast, biscuits or even jelly…”
You appear to be ahead of the curve on this one, mate.
Oh, hang on a mo. The full context is:
“You may find that you have lost your appetite. Try to eat dry, bland foods like toast, biscuits or even jelly…”
Close but no cigar. Never mind. ;-)
WIN SUSAN!!
Comment by tim | 02.26.2009 | 8:03 am
loving the jell-o posts from my flu-ridden sick bed.
Comment by Big Boned | 02.26.2009 | 8:03 am
“Down goes the Fat Man!”
Comment by Joe Biker | 02.26.2009 | 8:16 am
Now you have me wondering if all you ate was say red jello would the color of your pee change and/or would it smeill like jello (like when you eat Asparagus)?
Comment by kiwi | 02.26.2009 | 8:38 am
Hey,Fatty
Sounding alot like a chick mate.
And no your bum dont look big in those
cycling shorts!
Win Susan!
KIWI
Comment by Hilslug | 02.26.2009 | 9:24 am
Is it a bad sign the posts ended 19 hours ago, and the day ended 8.5 hours ago?
I get nauseous thinking of eating that much Jello.
Comment by southforkbikes | 02.26.2009 | 9:39 am
you need to work on you Preceived rate of Disgustion
Comment by Si | 02.26.2009 | 10:25 am
I think there is a new Jell-O based drink here…Jell-O Slammers! Pass the salt :)
Comment by AlicesYellowPorsche | 02.26.2009 | 10:55 am
oh, i totally agree about the breakfast cereal. i could easily live off cheerios for a week.
Comment by Lowrydr | 02.26.2009 | 11:04 am
Nice Banner change Fatty!!!
Win Susan!!!
Comment by Anonymous | 02.27.2009 | 12:22 am
I’m falling off my chair laughing.
Enjoy the peace (relative peace) of the break. I look forward to more of your greatness. We’ll think you’re great no matter what!