I Am About To Find Out What I Would Look Like With Giant Nostrils

11.3.2010 | 6:38 am

A Note from Fatty: I am in the middle of week two of an incredibly intense two weeks at work, so please do me a favor and forgive the infrequency and shortness and general phoned-it-in-ness of what I have been writing. My life will be back to normal next week, and I’ll be back to writing in great detail about things that haven’t actually happened again. Really.

Tomorrow — Thursday — is the premier of the Race Across the Sky documentary — the movie that details the 2010 Leadville 100 Mountain Bike Race.

I have previously mentioned that I was interviewed when this movie was filmed. At the time, I did not know how much of that interview was going to make it into the final cut.

Well, since then I’ve learned something amazing: my entire interview — all 90 minutes of it — is going to be in the movie. In its entirety. Uncut.

Okay, that may not be precisely true. However, I have learned that I will get more than the 2.2 seconds of film time I secretly (OK, not so secretly) expected I’d get.

Now, there’s a decent chance that this film will be playing at a theatre near you. So I hope you’ll go see the movie tomorrow (Click here to buy tickets). Because then if I’ve made a horrible fool of myself (a near certainty), I’ll at least be able to comfort myself with the knowledge that everyone who reads this blog will have had a good laugh at my expense.

Which is really one of the major reasons this blog exists, I guess, so I’m cool with that.

Of course, not everyone will be able to go see this movie. Fortunately for you, the people who made the movie sent me a photo — they called it a “production still,” but it looks like a photo to me — of me they took during my interview. Check me out:

201011022108.jpg

The question you undoubtedly have — and I confess to having the selfsame question — is, “Can Fatty possibly hold his stomach in like that for a full 45-minutes-long interview?”

I guess we’ll find out.

Now, to get the full experience of what I was like during this interview, just imagine me standing there for forty five minutes, fidgeting and trying to answer questions, then starting to ramble and losing my train of thought, but continuing to talk anyway.

You know, pretty much the same experience you get with this blog anyway, but more multimedia-y.

My Anticipated Film Experience

I’ll be going to the 6:30PM showing of the movie at the Cinemark University Mall theatre in Orem, UT. I’ll have my Mom, her husband, The Runner, and six children in tow. So we’ll probably fill up half the house ourselves.

Still, if If you’re local, you should join me.

Once there, I expect to be unable to participate in any kind of conversation, since I’ll be trying my hardest to remember whether I insulted anyone in the audience, not to mention whether I used any bad language on camera.

Once the film begins, I will clench my jaw and sit rigidly until I come on screen. At which point I will stare in awe at huge I am when projected onto aforementioned screen, not to mention how effectively every imperfection I have is exquisitely magnified.

I will then marvel at how huge my nostrils are.

Once I have seen and heard myself, I hope to be able to stop worrying about it and just enjoy the movie. But honestly, I know that won’t happen. I’ll fret and mentally edit everything I say, and will probably smack myself mentally (maybe physically too) over how I forgot to include the most important thing in my response to any given question.

After the movie I will sit low in my chair until everyone leaves, and then I will go to my car and change into a non-soaked-with-sweat shirt.

PS: The trailer for the movie is good enough that I don’t mind embedding it here again.

58 Comments

  1. Comment by Nooch | 11.3.2010 | 7:03 am

    Hey! at 1:31 there’s a Team Fatty member (is it you, senior?) hoofing up the climb… :D

    Nope, that’s not me. That’s Cory, a good friend of mine. – FC

  2. Comment by RANTWICK | 11.3.2010 | 7:11 am

    Big screen nostrils are big, but your nostrils aren’t any fatter than you are. I wish I could attend the the same premier as you… I’ll have to see if this thing is showing anywhere near me here in Canada… Anyway, relax and enjoy the show.

  3. Comment by michael | 11.3.2010 | 7:32 am

    http://imgur.com/qV095.png

    @nooch: that really looks like a guy in a fat cyclist jersey pushing his bike up the climb..

    seems like they really focussed on you elden ;)

  4. Comment by Mike Roadie | 11.3.2010 | 7:59 am

    LOL…..fame is so nostril-inducing!

  5. Comment by Tom Flanagan | 11.3.2010 | 9:35 am

    Next year’s film: “Race Across Fatty’s Nostrils.” Done.

  6. Comment by Aj | 11.3.2010 | 9:37 am

    Sorry Fatty, I know you think once you’ve seen yourself once you can just relax and enjoy. But unfortunately you are liberally sprinkled throughout the film to give each moment of the movie a little of your flavor. Also I am eating a donut which explains the use of terms like “sprinkles” and “flavor.”

    -Aj

  7. Comment by Paul Guyot | 11.3.2010 | 9:41 am

    I’m taking my 7-tear-old son to watch you and his uncle ride Leadville.

    My boy has already decided he wants to be a pro cyclist when he grows up. For Halloween he was “Andy Schleck” – I tried to get him to be “Fatty” and even offered my cool new Fat Cyclist jersey, but he said, “Dad… Fatties aren’t in the Tour de France.”

    But they do race across the sky.

  8. Comment by Janie_k, Tooting UK | 11.3.2010 | 10:47 am

    Dear Fatty,

    I know you are a powerful man with contacts…please can you use them to find out when this may be available in the UK as I can’t see any info anywhere about it.

    Cheers

    Janie_K

  9. Comment by Lisa | 11.3.2010 | 11:02 am

    I have my ticket. Can’t wait! Will you be offering autographed stills?

  10. Comment by Squirrelhead | 11.3.2010 | 11:21 am

    I cannot wait to see this movie in the theater! I love watching that trailer for sure.

  11. Comment by AEL | 11.3.2010 | 12:22 pm

    Wha????? The closest theater showing this epic film (and your huge nostrils) is 2.5 hours away from me. Wichita loses again. Who do I petition? Where do I call? Granted “mountain biking” isn’t too popular in the middle of Kansas. But still!

  12. Comment by Clydesteve | 11.3.2010 | 12:46 pm

    @AEL – I think I see your problem – Mountains themselves are not too popular in the middle of Kansas.

  13. Comment by AngieG | 11.3.2010 | 1:00 pm

    @AEL if it makes you feel any better, Levi won, lives in Santa Rosa and the closet theater to show the movie is 45 minutes away in San Rafael.

    Oh well…

    FC I have not doubt you will make us all proud!!

  14. Comment by MattC | 11.3.2010 | 1:05 pm

    Yo Angie…45 min is CLOSE! I have to go all the way down to Ventura (90 miles)…or over to Bakersfield…(ick!) Guess I’ll just have to wait for it on Netflix.

  15. Comment by Daniel | 11.3.2010 | 3:32 pm

    Showing in Nashville. Woot.

  16. Comment by Peter , CT USA | 11.3.2010 | 6:27 pm

    This movie looks killer. Can’t wait to buy a copy.

  17. Comment by Nurse Betsy | 11.3.2010 | 7:09 pm

    HEY SEATTLE FATTY’S……. got my ticket to see the movie at the regal theater south of Northgate mall. I’ll be wearing my new FC hoodie. If you see me say hi. I would love to meet some other Seattle Fatty’s.

    bracing myself for Fatty’s large nostrils.

  18. Comment by NYCCarlos | 11.4.2010 | 8:00 am

    @MattC – Last year’s is not available on netflix… i wouldn’t count on this one being available either. just drive the 45 min. you wuss! :-P

  19. Comment by Canadian Roadie | 11.4.2010 | 9:15 am

    Anyone know if this will be showing in Canada? West Coast please! I guess I’ll just have to buy the DVD when it comes out.

  20. Comment by TomE | 11.4.2010 | 9:43 am

    We will be watching here in Denver!!! Go Fatty

  21. Comment by DanO | 11.4.2010 | 1:41 pm

    Best of luck to you and the runner in NYC marathon this weekend.

  22. Comment by Brandy | 11.4.2010 | 3:37 pm

    We will be watching here in Sacramento! Woo hoo Fatty.

    Good luck in NYC this weekend also.

  23. Comment by nooch | 11.4.2010 | 4:53 pm

    Just met paul in NJ for the third time (once at LS Philly, once at my shops Trek Breast Cancer Ride) and startled he and his wife.. That’s what you get for having a big orange circle with a clydesdale in it in public!

  24. Comment by nooch | 11.4.2010 | 7:25 pm

    Okay, there are A LOT of Team Fatty in this movie!

  25. Comment by Steven | 11.4.2010 | 8:41 pm

    Fat-Ty,

    A movie star and 9:19 on a single speed. Man you rock.

    Theater in NYC was packed!

    SM

  26. Comment by Paul Guyot | 11.4.2010 | 9:08 pm

    Woo-Hoo!!! Great film. I laughed, I cried, I was SO proud wearing my Team Fatty hoodie in the PACKED theater in St. Louis!

    FC, you looked down right cool up there. And the Team Fatty member singing! Awesome.

    My son LOVED it.

    I sure hope the Lifetime guy doesn’t ruin Leadville.

  27. Comment by Terry | 11.4.2010 | 9:11 pm

    Nice showing! and in a time I could only dream of. I’ll be looking for your imdb.com page soon.

  28. Comment by Tracy | 11.4.2010 | 9:37 pm

    Just back from a showing in Minnesota. Nice job — star turn and race time! I doubt that my knees could take that kind of punishment, but watching you all do it was thrilling. May Leadville stay crazy and quirky under Lifetime’s management. I like my health clubs slick and sanitary. Let the LT100 keep its down and dirty mystique.

  29. Comment by Philly Jen | 11.4.2010 | 11:40 pm

    Missed it on premiere day — was busy bagging extra Z’s (and digesting chocolate ice cream!) after spending the morning in surgery. I’m happy to report that everything went without a hitch, and that I’m now free of the Evil Peanut. Cake time!

    Folks, if you can’t make it to NYC this weekend, you can still follow Team Fatty’s progress on the Web by tracking our runners online. You can also help people who are in NYC to cheer on the Fatties by using Twitter to post splits and runner sightings, using the tag #teamfattynyc.

    If you are in NYC this Sunday, Fatties will be congregating at a couple of spots on/near the course: Peter Pan Donut & Bake Shop in Brooklyn (leave extra time to catch the pokey G train), and Patsy’s Pizzeria near 117th and First Ave. Team spirit mandatory, weight gain optional, but probably inevitable — can you say “red velvet donut ice cream sandwich”?!?!

    Hope to see you there. (I’ll be the one in the tiara, with crumbs all over my face…)

  30. Comment by Nurse Betsy | 11.4.2010 | 11:52 pm

    Philly Jen, glad to hear the news that all is well! Woo Hoo.

    Just got back from the film here in Seattle. It was great. Fatty, your nostrils weren’t too shockingly big. Loved hearing all the stories and love the community that cycling brings. I think they said there will be another showing on Nov 9th, in case anyone missed it.

  31. Comment by Yvonne | 11.5.2010 | 12:01 am

    My favorite part of the movie tonight were your kids yelling out “that’s my dad!” Race Across The Sky was so inspiring!

  32. Comment by Harry H | 11.5.2010 | 3:20 am

    Great movie and nice interview you gave Fatty. I really enjoyed the story. So much it makes me want to give it a try.

  33. Comment by Andy D | 11.5.2010 | 6:37 am

    Great Movie! You did a great job and I really enjoyed your descriptions of the climbs. The fact that you almost made the 9 hour mark on a single speed is really impressive. Are you always going to ride the single speed at Leadville?

    Once you make the lottery, are you automatically in the next year or do you have to finish below a certain time to be automatically qualified?

    Anna Palaa Vaan, Fatty!

  34. Comment by Hawkeye | 11.5.2010 | 6:52 am

    Dude, you were the highlight of the movie. How much did you have to pay to get so much screen time? Pretty sure you had more dialog than even Ken.

  35. Comment by becky | 11.5.2010 | 7:27 am

    So if I go see my local theatre’s re-screening on Tuesday I will miss a MAJOR rehearsal (non-paying gig) and feel horrible guilty that I’m taking time off from my gig to do something fun. I’m dilemmafied. Should I do this and face the wrath and indignation of my director, or should I be one of the probably only 2 people in the theatre here in this non-biking friendly town I live in? Please help me solve my crisis. This has me not sleeping at night. Oh wait, I already did not sleep at night.

  36. Comment by Justin L | 11.5.2010 | 7:36 am

    Great job, I thought you did great and i was excited here in california to see you there. I want a single speed now

  37. Comment by Tank Engine | 11.5.2010 | 7:37 am

    Saw the flick last night in Marlboro MA. A rider of the 2010 Leadville 100 sat behind us with his family and cheered at the couple times he was seen in the film. Very cool movie and it provides great insight to why we ride. I watched with my arm in a brace from being hit by a car in October while out on my bike during a lunch time workout. The driver wasn’t looking when he made a left turn and collected me in his grill.

    I lost about 40 pounds since I started riding again last year and enjoy your blog. I’ll be riding as soon as I can. Thanks for the motivation.

  38. Comment by Paul Guyot | 11.5.2010 | 7:55 am

    @ PHILLY JEN!

    WOO HOO! Glad you are nut free!

    Will be thinking of you and all the Fatties in NYC.

    Would love to email with you sometime re: Philly fund raising.

  39. Comment by Jen | 11.5.2010 | 8:24 am

    Three of our bunch were able to attend last night. Fabulous!!

  40. Comment by TomE | 11.5.2010 | 9:22 am

    Are you sure the title wasn’t supposed to be “Race Across the Sky with Fatty”???? Denver theater yelled “Go Fatty” every time you showed up on the big screen. Tell me you have your SAG card now?!?!?!

  41. Comment by Lori Scheel | 11.5.2010 | 9:28 am

    Philly Jen – Thanks for the update. I’m glad you are no longer nuts ;) Finish strong girlie!

    I drove exactly 1 mile to see the movie (Sorry.) Fatty, you practically starred in it. You are, by the way, nuts! Nice work stud muffin. I am starting my training today so that one day I can be a volunteer for that race…YIKES!

  42. Comment by Nic Grillo | 11.5.2010 | 10:01 am

    Saw it last night in Long Beach, CA. Such an awesome ride! I don’t know if I’ll ever have what it takes, but I’d sure like to try someday! Great job Fatty!!

  43. Comment by Pedalpink | 11.5.2010 | 10:25 am

    My local bike clubs (Toledo Area Bicyclists and Maumee Valley Wheelmen) had a big turnout to watch Race Across the Sky 2 last night. Great movie, great evening. Good luck this week at the marathon!

  44. Comment by Arizona Guy | 11.5.2010 | 10:42 am

    Fat Man -

    great showing. Thanks to your post, I was fixated on nostrils the entire movie. I am happy to report that Ken C’s nostrils DWARFED yours, especially in that shot on the mine elevator. I was almost expecting a little mining car to come out of his schnozz.

  45. Comment by KK | 11.5.2010 | 11:13 am

    Saw the movie last night — the filmmakers did a great job balancing the race, its history and the landscape with the riders’ stories. Fatty sounded insightful and funny and humble. And the theater audience let out a low “whoa” when Fatty mentioned rigid singlespeed. It was fun to spot the FC jerseys throughout.

  46. Comment by Bryan (not that one) | 11.5.2010 | 11:20 am

    Watched it in Altamonte Springs, Florida last night. I enjoyed it even more than I thought I would. The cinematography was beautiful. The stories were inspiring. Fatty, you did great!

  47. Comment by Daniel C. | 11.5.2010 | 11:47 am

    Caught it at Disney World last night. I just might have to toss my name into the lottery this year!

  48. Comment by Kiki | 11.5.2010 | 12:06 pm

    Thanks to you my friends now think I am a wimp for riding a full suspension geared bike and taking close to 2 hours longer than some guy called Fatty! Good news is I didn’t hurt myself falling off my pedastal!

  49. Comment by Joel P. | 11.5.2010 | 1:08 pm

    Oh crap PJ, I was going to wear my tiara Sunday. Now I’ll have to think of something else. BTW Fatty, you better beat Subway Jarod’s time in NYC or I’ll have to start reading Fatsubeater.com.
    Joel P.

  50. Comment by Lisa | 11.5.2010 | 2:02 pm

    Great turnout in Rancho Cucamonga for the showing. I think your interview was great! Got laughs in all the right places. I loved it. Well worth staying up past my bedtime!

  51. Comment by Bridget | 11.5.2010 | 2:15 pm

    Hey Fatty! My brother and I attended the Race in the Sky premiere last night in NY (where we live) My brother was in the Leadville bike race this August as a first timer and came in at 11:21 WHoot Whoot! Belt buckle. Inspired by the entirty of the experience I become a cyclist myself (but no way in hell even going to attempt Leadville)

    So last night after viewing the great movie, I said to my brother, “I really like that Fatty guy, he is really cool!” So he sent me your blog and warned me that you are ‘taken’ kidding, I’m not hitting on you, just giving credit where credit is due.

    I now see that you will be running the NY marathon. Well, my brother and our friends will be watching the marathon in Queens (too late for him to grow out a mo) but I’ll be wearing a Team Fatty shirt (hand made, I’m afraid) Go FATTY!

  52. Comment by deepbrook | 11.5.2010 | 3:05 pm

    Watched the premiere last night at Fenway 13 in Boston–great movie, despite the satellite glitches. Best was going back and checking out Fatty’s 2010 race report with new visuals to go along the read:
    2010 LT100 race report

  53. Comment by Lisa | 11.5.2010 | 4:09 pm

    Hi Fatty! I got to see it in Austin, TX where your nostrils were not too big at all! Great movie, great race, and truly great community!

    Made me want to get out my mountain bike and go for a really long ride on the DIRT — the longest ride I’ve ever done on it was 50 miles for the Austin Ride for the Roses back in 2005 (with road slicks). That was a great day. :)

    Hugs to all!

  54. Comment by Lindaloo | 11.5.2010 | 5:19 pm

    Errr…. went to see Fatty star in his movie last night and we were evacuated due to the smoke alarms going off and a pervasive burned smell through out. Fooey, by the time the fire department let us back in, the theater was not showing our movie! So disappointing! Never did find out what the problem was.

  55. Comment by Mark | 11.5.2010 | 6:14 pm

    Great movie! Nice interview! Back in my youth I lived in CO and climbed all the 14,000′ peaks, but none of them were anywhere near as hard as that race looked. Kudos to you and everyone that suffered that day!

  56. Comment by Brian | 11.5.2010 | 9:08 pm

    Awesome film, great to see Levi break Lance’s record. Enjoyed your interview, just wish I had gotten a chance to see what you were riding? What brand single speed were you riding? Gearing?
    My wife and I were shocked that there was no publicity for the movie-she just happened to check your site and found out. There were no posters at our local shops (there are 4 shops in our town and nobody I talked to even knew the movie was being released). If you get an ear at Citizen Pictures let ‘em know, they did an awesome job on everything but advertising!
    Good job on another finish!

  57. Comment by dude | 11.5.2010 | 9:42 pm

    Phat film.

    I agree that the publicity was rather weak. I stumbled upon the film somewhere online and there were only 12 in the theater. And San Francisco is full of cycling hipsters.

  58. Comment by Sergio | 11.9.2010 | 6:46 pm

    Going to see this today… Looking forward to Fatty’s interview!

 

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