11.12.2008 | 3:32 pm
Here are some interesting facts for you:
- Team Dell — you know, the computer guys — had the largest LiveStrong Challenge team ever last year, with more than 260 people in it.
- Team Toi raised the most money ever, raising over $350,000 for the LiveStrong Challenge.
Here are my thoughts on both of these records: Pffff.
Team Fat Cyclist: Fighting For Susan
For 2009, I am going to form Team Fat Cyclist: Fighting For Susan for the LiveStrong Challenge, and I want you to join me. If you’re willing to put in some work, together our neighborhood will not simply break these records; we will crush them.
No, we will demolish them.
And humiliate them, just for fun.
Oh, and by the way, by either joining the team or contributing to the team — your choice — you will automatically be entering yourself in raffles to win prizes that will make your head spin.
Let’s Talk About The Prizes A Little Bit
I love to give stuff away; that’s one of the things I like best about my blog. And as part of this LiveStrong Challenge, I have asked my friends in the industry to donate some cool stuff to raffle off to those who donate.
And they have come through in spades.
Here are just a few of the things you can look forward to. I’m being vague here about brands and so forth until I have things nailed down, but the truth is, the odds are good that there will be more — not less — than what I’m talking about.
- An ultra-high-end 29″ single speed mountain bike. And by ultra-high-end, I mean ultra-ultra-high end.
- An ultra-high-end road bike. By which I mean, ultra-ultra-ultra high end.
- A bombproof, light wheelset for mountain biking
- A featherweight wheelset for road biking
- A ridiculously high-end road group — one of the first of its kind available, in fact.
- A top of the top-end MTB group
- A full-service mountain MTB vacation with a top-notch touring outfit
- A beautiful and functional commuter bike.
- Be the first person alive to ever meet, ride with, and learn the identity of Bike Snob NYC. Yes, really. But you can’t photograph him or tell anyone else who he is. Or you’ll be sorry.
- Bike Clothes, Components, and Gear Galore.
And there are more prizes I haven’t mentioned here because I’m not perfectly confident they’ll come through. But I will say this: I am amazed at how many generous people there are in the bike industry, and am incredibly impressed at how badly they want to fight cancer.
The short version: if you’re willing to donate some time and / or money, you’re going to help me create an incredible legacy for Susan, and you might win some cool stuff. Really, really cool stuff.
How It’s Going to Work
I love competition, and I love silliness. So we’re going to have fun making a huge impact and raising money.
Here’s what we’re going to do.
- On December 1 — the first day it’s allowed — of this year, I’ll be creating Team Fat Cyclist: Fighting for Susan.
- Anytime on that day or after, you can join the team, which will give you your very own fundraising page. It costs $50 to register. That’s your entry fee to be able to participate in the event.
- Start bugging your friends and family to donate to your fundraising page.
- I will start holding raffles on a frequent basis. Sometimes, anyone who wants to donate will be included in the raffles, sometimes the raffles will only be available to team members.
- Sometimes, I’ll give prizes to people who are kicking butt at fundraising. The prizes will not be trivial. At all.
This may sound crazy, but I really believe it’s possible: If 500 of us join this team, and then we each raise $1000 — an easily attainable sum — we’ll shatter the previous team fundraising records with half a million dollars.
If, on the other hand, we all kick butt and each raise $2000, we’ll astound the world by having raised a million dollars together.
And I love the idea of telling Susan that 500 of her friends got together and raised a million bucks to fight cancer in her honor.
What You Should Do Right Now
Actually, there’s not too much you need to do just yet. I can’t form Team Fat Cyclist: Fighting For Susan until the beginning of next month.
But there are a few things you can do. Most of them are easy.
- Decide you’re going to join. You’ll be part of something big, and worthwhile, and hopefully record-breaking. Start saving up your $50 membership fee, and some extra to donate for your own page, so you’ll have a good chance of winning one of the prizes.
- Start making a list of who you can ask to donate. There will be some giveaways where team members who have earned the most will get prizes.
- If you’re in the bike — or a related — industry and want to be a part of this, you can. Think about what you’d like to donate, and then email me. I will give you the recognition you deserve, and you’ll have done something awesome. If you need to convince the higher-ups at your company that you’re reaching a sizeable audience, let them know that Fat Cyclist averages 60,000+ unique visitors, 250,000 visits, and 640,000 pageviews per month. Which is quite a few.
- Tell other cycling friends they need to join. Last year the team competition was dominated by a computer company (Dell) and a fashion designer (Toi). Seriously, that’s just sad. It’s like having Richard Simmons beat you up for your lunch money.
In the next few weeks, I’ll be revealing more about what the contests will be like, what you’ll be able to win, and some more surprises.
For now, I’m just excited to be doing something positive, and am looking forward to having you be a big part of it.
We’re going to kick butt.
PS: Big thanks to Mike Roadie for emailing me with the suggestion of doing a Team Fatty this year. I’ll be relying on him for a lot of the logistics and whatnot, since he clearly knows his way around his program.
Comments (172)
11.11.2008 | 8:50 am
I think I’ve mentioned before that for a long time I’ve been considering writing a book. Originally, I had the idea of it being a lot like this blog, but more … ummm … bookish. During the past few weeks, though, what my book needs to be about has become a lot more clear.
It needs to be about you.
Fat Cyclist readers have shown me exactly how good people can be, to people they’ve never even met. The support Susan and I have received from you doesn’t seem at all like a group of random individuals reading something I write a few times per week.
It feels like a neighborhood.
And that’s pretty amazing to me. Definitely something worth writing about. So I’m working on revising my book proposal. I’ll let you know how it turns out.
Meanwhile, I think one of the important virtues of a neighborhood is that everyone pitches in when they see that someone else in the neighborhood needs help. You all have done this for me in dozens of ways.
And now I want to do something good, too. Something good for you, and also good in the fight against cancer.
I’m just starting to work out what it is and how we’ll make it work, but I’m pretty sure you’ll find it a fun way to join your neighbors in doing something really good.
I’m excited, and that’s a nice change right now.
I’ll explain soon. Tomorrow, hopefully.
Comments (80)
11.9.2008 | 9:15 pm
I have not been keeping track of how often, each day, I ask Susan, “Is there anything I can do for you?” But I think it may be too often, because she answers, “No, I’m just as comfortable now as I was ten minutes ago.”
I can’t help it. I’m desperate to make things better for her, even if in small ways.
And, during last weekend, I have.
The Worst Remote in the World
The hospital bed we have set up in what was formerly our living room is really good to have. Because of it, Susan is always close to the family. It’s easy for me to get her food (the kitchen is in the adjoining room). She has a great view of our cul-de-sac, which is where all the neighborhood kids play.
The bed itself is comfortable, too; the head and feet can be raised at the touch of a button.
And that’s where the problem is.
Allow me to introduce you to what I consider the worst remote ever designed:
First of all, those blister-style buttons are entirely invisible in low light, and you would (not) be surprised at how often one encounters a low light situation when one is in bed.
Second, can you tell which button raises your head? Yeah, the top-left one. I’ll bet you got that one right. And which button lowers your head? If you guessed the bottom-left button — the button that shows a lowered head — you guessed wrong. No, the button that lowers the head is the blister button at the top-right: the one that shows lowered feet.
Oh, and it gets better. To raise your feet, you press the button over the lowered head. Yes, really. And the worst one is: to lower your feet, you press the button showing raised feet. That’s right: that bottom-right button does exactly the opposite of what it shows.
If you’re confused by this now, consider how you might feel trying to decipher this thing if you were really sick and not thinking at your clearest.
I’m sorry; I need a moment to let my blood pressure return to normal. I tend to take stuff like this a little personally right now.
Anyway, here is how I rectified the problem, using sticker dots and some tape:
Problem solved. I’m a hero.
Bike Tech Rules
Another problem Susan’s got is getting enough to drink. She’s weak, she’s tired, and her hands shake. It’s a big effort for her to raise her head, find, lift and sip from a cup or bottle.
Here is my solution:
There’s a lot of clutter in that picture, so I’ll explain.
- I ziptied a carabiner-style keychain holder to the rail on Susan’s bed.
- I hung a Camelbak water bottle from the carabiner.
- I added a Camelbak drink tube adapter to the water bottle.
- I ziptied another carabiner to the rail as a place to hang the bite valve.
The result? A non-leaking, non-dribbling, non-spilling way to drink that Susan can easily find even in the dark. She doesn’t have to lift a bottle or cup, and can just let the bite valve fall out of her mouth when she’s done.
I believe this may be the best use of Camelbak technology, ever. I’m surprised that they don’t have setups like these in hospitals; they’re much easier for a sick patient to get to than a traditional cup.
I can’t help but think that my solution to this problem is strongly tied to what I know: I’m a cyclist, so of course I solved this problem using zipties and a Camelbak drink tube.
So: hooray for bike tech and its applications in the real world.
Comments (90)
11.6.2008 | 2:05 pm
I won’t be going to Fall Moab this weekend. I need to stay home and take care of Susan. (Quick aside here: when I say "I need to stay home and take care of Susan," I mean that literally. As in, this is something I need, not something Susan needs. The truth is, I could probably find someone to stay with and watch after Susan, but I simply don’t want to. Right now it’s very difficult for me to go to work or the grocery store or anywhere else. Leaving Susan for a full day — never mind three days — just isn’t going to happen.)
The core team, being the kind of people the core team is (are?), actually bandied about some email suggesting they have Fall Moab locally or postponing it. I put the kibosh on those ideas, for very good reasons:
- There’s half a foot of snow on the ground in the valley. Probably more like a foot up in the mountains.
- If any of them were having difficulties at home, that wouldn’t stop me from having fun.
- I’m expecting them to send me stories, photos, and film of glorious carnage.
So, while I will not be attending Fall Moab, I do have some valuable advice for those who will, based on years of experience.
- Be prepared for snoring. An odd thing has happened over the ten-or-more-year history of our annual Fall Moab trip: we’ve become middle-aged. Those of us who have always snored, now snore louder. Those of us who used to not snore, now do. So if you’re bothered by other people’s snoring, you might want to bring earplugs. Or Lunesta. Or — if Kenny’s snoring gets really, really bad (and it will) — a pellet gun.
- How to properly prepare bratwurst. There’s no secret or trick to making great bratwurst, but everyone acts like it’s a religious revelation when they have a good one. So here’s how it’s done. Use Budweiser to boil the brats, with an onion chopped in and a half bottle of Worcestershire sauce poured in. Simmer for at least half an hour, and for much longer if you feel like it — up to an hour, if you feel like it. Then grill over charcoal or wood. Not gas. Serve with a good bun (Kenny’s homemade bread is the best) and Gulden’s Spicy Brown Mustard.
- Dare Tom To Do Dumb Stuff. While the rest of us have figured out that we’re middle aged, Tom is convinced he just left school and could still play college-level rugby. So, tell him to try moves that are very dangerous, and then get out the cameras and roll tape. (Bonus tip: Issue the most outrageous challenges only when you have a good cell signal.)
- Have Some Duct Tape Handy. I understand BotchedExperiment will be riding for the first time since he nearly cut off his leg. If you hear a flap-flap-flapping sound, that’s probably his quad becoming unattached from his leg. Duct tape should be sufficient for holding it in place, at least until you finish the ride.
- Don’t freak Nick out . Nick will be joining you for his first Fall Moab ever. He comes from Australia and is therefore unprepared for exactly how bizarre a bunch of Utahoos can be when their wives and ecclesiastical authorities are not watching.
- Ignore Kenny When He Says Something’s "Not That Far." The difference between Kenny’s perception of how far something is and how far something actually is, is very great indeed.
- Take pictures. Lots and lots of pictures. And video.
Oh, and above all, spend lots of time talking about how much better the trip would be if only Fatty were along.
Comments (41)
11.5.2008 | 12:31 pm
I think it’s been at least a week since I’ve been on a bike. Probably more like ten days, really.
But I’ve developed an awesome new move, one which I am extremely proud of.
Specifically, I am able to help Susan move out of the bed and into a wheelchair — smoothly and efficiently.
Furthermore, I am able to also do this move in reverse, moving Susan from her wheelchair into an easy chair or her bed.
I make it look easy. I’m that good.
I admit, though, that it took some practice for me to get this move right. Not too long ago I would grapple and struggle, bruising my (patient) wife while I tried to figure out how I had managed to plop Susan face-down on the bed. Or nearly drop her on the floor.
But not now. Now I cleanly and elegantly help Susan get to where she wants to be, with what appears to be no fuss at all — and with a bare minimum of discomfort on Susan’s part.
I have never been so proud of mastering a move in my entire life.
PS: The New Fat Cyclist gear — jerseys, arm warmers, shorts, and the wool jersey pre-order — are still available, though some sizes have sold out. Check out what you can get here. Also, a reminder: Twin Six is (absurdly generously) donating to me 50% of the purchase price of all (not just Fat Cyclist) Men’s XL-and-larger and Women’s L-and-larger jerseys. If you’ve been wanting to both get a jersey and help defray some of my expenses, this is a really great way to do it.
Comments (44)
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