I am having a lot of fun with FattyCast, my new podcast. It’s a chance for me to do something new, which doesn’t happen all that often after ten (closer to eleven now) years of blogging. I’m talking with very interesting people. I’m hearing amazing stories. I’m learning a lot.
The latest episode of the FattyCast is with Yuri Hauswald, the winner of the 2015 Dirty Kanza. But Yuri’s a lot more than a pro cyclist. He works full-time as the cycling community manager for Gu Energy. He writes. He raises money for good causes.
He’s strong, like bull.
I really enjoyed talking with Yuri, and I’m confident you’ll enjoy listening. For reals.
Here’s where you can find the FattyCast with Yuri:
I’m really excited about the guests I’ve got lined up in the upcoming weeks (I’m actually conducting an interview every day this week, so will have quite a few backlogged for editing). And I’m tempted to tell you who they are. But I’m not going to, at least not yet.
However.
So far people have been really generous with their time. When I reach out, it’s been pretty rare for people to say “no.” So. If there’s someone you would like me to reach out to, let me know. If I think to myself, “Yeah, I’d like to ask that person questions for an hour or so,” I’ll do it. Especially if you have contact info.
Meanwhile, enjoy this episode (and please, if you’re using iTunes, do me the favor of leaving a review, OK?)!
Now, I would have liked to make these free all the way through Christmas day, but Amazon.com will only let me make them free for five days.
So don’t wait. Go get them now. Tell your friends to go get them too.
I hope you enjoy them. But if you don’t, please let me know and I’ll promptly refund your money.
Merry Christmas, A Note About Today’s 100 Miles of Nowhere Race Report: This race report comes from Jeff Dieffenbach, who you might remember as one of my teammates at Boggs last summer. I predict you will enjoy this report very much.
100MoN Jersey Confounds Man and Machine Alike
Curious Cycling, Curious Math by Jeff Dieffenbach
I rode my first 100MoN in 2012–200+ miles down the length of New Jersey. Because what says nowhere like 200 miles of New Jersey?
2015 marked my second 100MoN. The announced November dates fell squarely in the middle of cyclocross (CX) season. One hundred miles asks a lot during CX season–perhaps I could find a Sat-Sun event, enter multiple races each day, and wrap a number of preride laps around the races to piece together some sizable mileage.
I checked the Massachusetts schedule–the Plymouth Festival of Cyclocross spanned Sat Oct 31 and Sun Nov 1. Based on my age (getting up there) and ability (not really up there at all), I qualified each day for one race in the morning and two races in the afternoon.
A Digression About Cyclocross (CX)
Failing to sense much of a CX presence in Fattyworld, I’ll digress a bit to provide some context. Amateur CX races typically last around 40 minutes and consist of 4-6 laps of one and a half or so miles on a mixture of dirt, grass, sand, and a bit of pavement.
At first glance, CX bikes look like their road counterparts, but a closer inspection reveals wider, knobbier tires and either cantilever or disc brakes. The tire and brake variations accommodate the often slick or downright sloppy course conditions that the fall/winter season often offers.
Racers maneuver their machines around laps spotted with numerous technical elements. These elements include technical sharp and off camber turns, power straightaways, and barriers or steep climbs that force riders to dismount and carry their bikes.
A day of CX features multiple fields starting at hourly intervals. Ability, age, or both define the makeup of each field. Regarding ability, as with road racing, CX uses the “Cat” system: Pro and Cat 1 at the advanced end and Cat 4 and 5 at the lesser end. Brackets of ten years typically make up the age groups.
As a 50 year old Cat 4 racer, I qualified for the 9am Cat 4/5 race, the 1pm Masters 45+ race, and the 2pm Cat 2/3/4 race. Even two races a day is a lot–there was no way I was doing three.
Still, I owed Camp Kasem the miles, so I opted for Cat 4/5 and Cat 2/3/4 on Saturday and Cat 4/5 and Masters 45+ on Sunday.
Race 1: Saturday, Cat 4/5
Resplendent in my 100MoN jersey (thanks, DNA Cycling, for the expedited shipment!) and 2015 Team Fatty bibs, I lined up in the starting grid with 86 like-minded knuckleheads and waited for the starting whistle.
A Digression About How Cyclocross Points Work
Unlike road racing, which finishes with a bunch sprint, cyclocross STARTS that way. The objective: be first to the first turn (the “hole shot”) and avoid the inevitable bottleneck that quickly builds up behind.
Winning the hole shot pretty much requires a start in the first row, or maybe the second row for a particularly strong rider who gets a lucky break. So what determines a racer’s starting row? Cross Points, or CXP.
Every CX racer carries a CXP designation based on prior results. The best male racers in the world cluster from 100 to 150 or so CXP (lower being better; at present, the top 12 are either Belgian or Dutch, with the top-ranked American, Jeremy Powers, sitting at 34th).
A strong Cat 2 rider might be at 250-300 CXP. By comparison, a back-half-of-the-pack Cat 4 racer such as yours truly naturally falls around 600-650 CXP.
Cross Points earned in a given race depend on the relative strength of the field (be thankful that I’m sparing you the detailed underlying formula). By selectively choosing one’s field for a given race, it’s possible to game the system a bit and artificially lower one’s CXP.
And exactly that sort of manipulation explains why I’m currently sitting on 562 CXP, almost 100 better than I deserve.
I find myself several rows ahead of riders who match my ability, including teammates DavidG, MaxG, TroyK, DanS, and JasonW. The whistle sounds–aiming to widen my starting position advantage, I put everything I can into the opening sprint to get as far forward in the hole shot bottleneck as I can.
At Plymouth, that hole shot consists of a sharp left turn up a curb off the pavement and into a narrow, curvy descent on dirt. We jostle our way to the bottom at a walking pace, dismount, shoulder our bikes, and navigate the Plymouth course’s defining element–a steep run-up.
Photo Credit: J.Daniels/muddydogbikes
At the top, it’s back on the bike, knock the mud out of my cleats, clip back in, make a few turns, and dismount for a pair of barriers.
A Digression on What a “Cyclocross Barrier” Is
A cyclocross barrier is a 12 to 15 inch high plank set perpendicular to the course. Barriers come in pairs separated by 12 to 15 feet.
Safely over the barriers, I remount, then just as quickly dismount to run the short sand pit leading into the woods. On later laps, I’ll ride the sand, but congestion makes that impossible on lap one.
Back on the bike, I navigate some fast technical turns through the trees before reaching a fire road for the course’s first real power section. The slight uphill grade coupled with the dirt and rock surface takes its toll and I slide back a few positions.
I pop out of the woods onto playing fields, navigating hairpin turns through trees before the next power section, this time on grass. A short set of steps interrupts the power section, forcing a dismount/run/remount.
The lap finishes with a straight paved path through more woods, a few turns around a tennis court, and finally a few more turns before the paved finish straightaway. Now I just have to suffer this ordeal four more times.
A Digression on Why I Love Cyclocross, Even Though It’s Awful
Cyclocross is raced pretty much at heart rate threshold for the full 40 minutes. Yes, a few sections afford recovery, but for the most part, it’s all out. With one lap down, four to go, and my heart rate pinned, I once again question why I love CX so much.
Several reasons:
The camaraderie. I train and race with a great group of friends always ready to trade a tip, a beer, or in tight turns, the occasional elbow.
The competition. In road racing, a rider of my “talent” quickly finds himself off the back and alone; in CX, the slower speeds and lack of the peloton’s aero benefits means there’s almost always a rider ahead to chase and another behind who’s chasing.
The course. Racing CX bikes off road is a melt-away-the-years blast without the imminent death risk of full-on mountain biking.
The next four laps see essentially a repeat of lap one, so I’ll spare the description save for the finish. As I come out out of the woods after the fire road midway through the final lap, I spot a rider a hundred yards or so ahead. Too far for a catch, I think, but I give it a try. The gap slowly closes, and as we round the final turn onto the finish pavement, I’m right on his wheel.
I’m built more like a sprinter than a climber, but my 1×11 gearing gives up a lot at the high end. No time for gear regrets, I go full throttle and upshift to my top-end 38-11. I’ve got more left in the tank than he does and cross the line ahead by several bike lengths.
The results would later show that I took 61st out of 87, a pretty typical outcome for me, earning 659 CXP in the process. Better than that, though, was holding off my teammates. Without my starting position advantage, I likely would have lost to Troy and been in much more of a dogfight with David, Jason, Dan, and Max.
Cumulative miles: 3.4 for preride, 7.4 for race, 10.8 total
Post-Race
Race 2: Saturday, Cat 2/3/4
Fear not, I won’t spend nearly as much time describing races two through four. I’ve got no business being in a 2/3/4 race, and this particular edition proves the point. I’m quickly off the back and riding solo, demonstrating the occasional fallacy in my point above a rider behind who’s chasing.
I finish 42 of 45. On paper, much worse than the morning effort. But the strength of field comes into play in determining my CXP–I end up with 492, my best ever by 30.
Cumulative miles: 4.6 for four more prerides, 7.4 more for race 2, 22.8 total
Race 3: Sunday, Cat 4/5
Overcast and hints of rain replace Saturday’s sun. Saturday’s 40 degree temps at 9am give way to Sunday’s 50. I’ll take the trade. But just barely.
Photo Credit: Kristin Brandt/Steve The Bike Guy Velo Studio
A few changes to the course, as is typical in a two-day event at a given venue. Only one friend with whom I’m competitive today: TomP, whom I’ve never beaten, but against whom I’m close. Maybe today’s the day.
Tom and I spend the first few laps trading positions–I’m better at the technical stuff, he takes me on the power sections. On the final lap, he pulls away. For me, 65 of 88, good for 650 CXP.
High point of the race? Just as the starting whistle blew, the organizers tried to pull me. They’d tell me after the race that the black “100″ on white field of my 100MoN jersey, adjacent front and back to the race number pinned to my right side, was wreaking havoc on the human scorers and finish line camera.
Cumulative miles: 2.6 for preride, 8.6 for race, 34 total
Sunday: Masters 45+
Black duct tape covering the 100MoN “100,” I’m ready to go, and ready to be more competitive than Saturday’s Cat 2/3/4 effort.
Typically, compared to a 2/3/4 or 3/4 field, a Masters race will have equally good talent at the front of the race. But the falls off faster across the typical Masters field. I should finish better than yesterday’s 42 of 45.
I don’t. Twenty-two of 23. And only 668 CXP, not even as good as the 4/5 race.
Cumulative miles: 7.5 for race, 41.5 total
Not even 42 miles? I’d fallen well short of the target 100. Or had I?
Applying the universally-accepted dirt-to-pavement multiplier of 2.5, my 41.5 became an eerily Leadville-like 103.8.
And, despite never placing in even the top two-thirds of a field across my four races, I nonetheless eked out a position on the top step of the podium in the 100MoN-Clad, Half-Century-Old, Sub-300-Watt category.
As I have been politely instructed, I have therefore put a penny in an old man’s hat (i.e., my own). And also, I have made a list for you. A list of Christmas present ideas. Specifically, these are ideas of presents I think most cyclists would like to get.
Which means, as you might expect, that you should probably share this post around to people who are otherwise probably going to get you a novelty bicycle bell.
You’re welcome.
Idea 1: Make the World a Better Place: There’s a good chance the cyclists you’re buying presents for already have everything they need, both bicycle-wise and otherwise. But you know who doesn’t have everything they need? Kids in Zambia and Kenya. They don’t have anything close to what they need, but the gift of a sturdy bike from World Bicycle Relief will help them have a vastly better life. So how about this? Make a donation in honor of your favorite cyclist. Anonymous wonderful people will match that donation, and WBR will send an e-card (or if you donate $147+, WBR will send an actual printed card) on your behalf.
Idea 2: Send Them Fat Cyclist Gear: Did you know that FatCyclist gear is totally in stock and ready to ship? It is, right now. And it is awesome — the best-made gear I have ever had. The technical gear (jerseys, shorts, bibs) is made in Italy, and it is wonderful. And priced to sell. Order here.
Idea 3: Stan’s Tire Sealant: If there’s a mountain biker on your list, that mountain biker almost certainly rides with tubeless tires. Which means that rider needs sealant on a regular basis. And that sealant is quite likely Stan’s. Get that rider a twelve-pack box of tire sealant, each of which is good for repairing one tire on the go. Or get that rider a pint of sealant, for setting up up to eight tires (because you’ve got to replace the sealant a couple times per season).
Idea 4: A Bike Fitting: A bike fitting is one of the very best things a cyclist can spend time and money on; a well-fit bike makes a huge difference to every ride you go on from that point forward. But it is really rare for people to get themselves a fitting. So, go to your favorite high-end shop and buy a gift certificate good for a fitting for that rider in your life. For what it’s worth, I’m a big fan of the Specialized Body Geometry Fit methodology. Find a Specialized shop nearby that does these. Your friend will thank you.
Idea 5: CO2 Cartridges: Most riders use CO2 inflators to take care of field repairs, and having a big ol’ box of CO2 cartridges on-hand is really convenient. And it’s a lot cheaper to buy them in semi-bulk than one at a time. About every three years, I buy myself a box of thirty 16g threaded CO2 cartridges. And while this isn’t exactly a sexy present, it’s something they’ll be glad you gave them when they need it.
Idea 6: A Torque Wrench: The carbonization of the bike universe means that just cranking down hard on a bolt ’til it won’t turn anymore isn’t the right way to go. A lot of riders, though, are guesstimating on how tight to go…and often, we’re totally wrong. A couple of years ago, James Huang at CyclingNews/BikeRadar recommended the CDI TorqControl adjustable torque wrench, and it’s been my go-to wrench ever since. It comes with the bits you’re most likely to use most often, too.
Idea 7: Grips: If your friend mountain bikes, they probably need new grips on their bike. See, grips wear out, just like chains and cleats and tires and everything else. But while most riders know to change these other things, they just let their grips get older and more compacted and torn up. Which is a shame, because a set of grips is a pretty economical buy, and can make a real difference in how your bike fits. About half my friends ride with Ergon grips, while the rest of us (me included) ride with the ultra-plain ESI silicone grips. Both are great at what they’re for; you just need to check with your friend to see what they are using right now.
Idea 8: Another Floor Pump / Shock Pump: It’s unlikely your riding friend doesn’t have at least one pump. But if they put that bike in a car fairly often, maybe another pump would be really welcome. I personally have two Specialized Air Tool floor pumps: one I keep in my garage, one I keep in my truck. This way, no matter where I start my ride from, I’m guaranteed to have a pump on-hand to make sure my tires are good.
Also, if your friend is a mountain biker, they need a couple shock pumps, for the same reason. I have two Bontrager Shock Pumps (again, one in the garage, one in the truck), and they’ve served me flawlessly.
Idea 9: Road ID: These are such a good idea, and The Hammer got me one a couple years ago. I haven’t gotten in the habit of wearing it, which just goes to show: I’m an idiot.
Idea 10: Gloves: Everyone’s got their preference, but for the past several years, I wear Specialized Ridge gloves on pretty much every single ride I go on, both road and mountain. For one thing, they’re comfortable. For another, they sorta-kinda work with smartphones. They don’t last forever (I generally go through a pair or two each season) but they’re good protection in case of a fall, and they keep your hands from slipping on the bar.
Idea 11: A Helmet: Helmets don’t last forever. If your rider has been using the same helmet for more than three or four years, maybe it’s time to swap out to a new one, even if they haven’t wrecked. I recommend buying this gift in the form of a gift certificate to your local bike shop, because getting the fit right is absolutely essential and can be done only in person. For what it’s worth, the two helmets I switch between are the Specialized S-Works Prevail and the Giro Synthe.
Idea 12: Seat bag: There seems to be a disdain for seat bags lately. I don’t understand it. It’s so nice to know I have what I need to take care of a flat or basic mechanical attached to my bike…without having to remember to bring anything. For my money, Banjo Brothers seat bags look great, are affordable, and are incredibly durable. I have a mini seat bag on all my road bikes, and a small seat bag on all my mountain bikes.
Ideas 13-19: Movies and Books About Bikes: Lately, I’ve read/watched and enjoyed each of the following:
Inspired to Ride - Mike Dion’s documentary about the self-supported inaugural TransAm race
Ten Points - Bill Strickland’s intense, inspiring and beautifully-written story of childhood, fatherhood, and trying to score ten points in a local crit series.
Rusch to Glory - Reba Rusch’s extraordinary story of her life (so far), from childhood to adventure racer to rock climber to pro cyclist.
Fat Tire Flyer - A gloriously beautiful history of the early days of mountain biking.
Becoming Frozen - Jill Homer’s latest book, a telling of her first year in Alaska.
Road to Valor - An amazing true story of racing, the Tour de France, heroism, amazing strength, and incredible nobility.
I can’t imagine any cyclist not enjoying any or all of these.
Idea 20: A Race or Event: Got a significant other who’s a cyclist? Here’s an incredible gift to give: a race or other big event. No, not just the entry into the event. Give them the promise of time to train, and support during the event. That is a massive gift.
PS: Is this a comprehensive list? No.This is not a comprehensive list. Add your own ideas to it. Thank you.
PPS: Because I didn’t get this post finished ’til late in the day (on Thursday), I want to leave it up for a few days. Hence, the traditional Friday 100 Miles of Nowhere Race Report will go up this Monday. Thank you for your attention to this matter and stuff.
A Note from Fatty: I’m currently on a flight back from Orlando, where The Twins, The Hammer and I were spending a few days at Universal Studios and Sea World.
In Diagon Alley
We had an awesome time together.
After riding Riptide Whiplash
And we did exactly nothing bike-related.
FattyCast Episode 2: David McQuillen, the Evil Genius Behind Sufferfest
I kinda had a suspicion that I’d like doing this whole podcasting thing. Partially because over the years I’ve met a lot of people who have interesting bike-related stories and careers, and partially because I…well, I like talking with people. And when I manage to remember to focus on listening instead of making the conversation about myself, these chats are turning out to be really great.
I’m a big fan of Sufferfest videos; I love the way they combine humor, inspiring race footage, and workouts that are just this side of too hard. I can’t even count the times I’ve been close to quitting a Sufferfest session…then kept going, because I knew that I was supposed to be hurting this bad.
In this episode of the FattyCast, David and I talk about the how and why of Sufferfest, how David creates the videos, and the projects they’ve got coming up next.
And they blindside me into promising to do a couple of things I’m already regretting (but do not intend to pull out of).
You can listen to the Sufferlandria Episode of the FattyCast here:
And, just in case you missed the links earlier, you can get to the FattyCast in these ways as well:
I’m ridiculously happy to note that a lot of people have really enjoyed the first couple episodes of the FattyCast, and so I’m working on additional episodes, sometimes with people most cyclists have heard of, sometimes with folks very few of you would recognize, but still have really great stories to tell.
I plan to post an interview per week — generally about an hour long — for as long as I enjoy doing this, or until people stop agreeing to talk with me.
I also like the idea of doing readings from my own books, and posting them intermittently as separate episodes. Most of these readings will be of one or two chapters, so won’t take more than ten or fifteen minutes of your time.
That said, I actually tried recording me reading a chapter from one of my books…and then I deleted it, due to a couple of problems:
I had a very difficult time handling the footnotes I riddle the book with. They break up the flow of the story, which is sometimes a huge problem for an out-loud reading.
I sound stilted and robotic, as if I’m completely unfamiliar with the story. Which is weird (since I am the author and all), but completely true.
So I’m going to keep practicing on this, and will begin releasing them as soon as I can without absolute embarrassment.
A Note About Audio and Other Technical Stuff
I’m new to doing this, and am still learning how to edit audio. I haven’t nailed getting levels to match (sometimes I sound louder than my guest, sometimes my guest sounds louder than I do), and I’m leaving in diversions, stutters, and pauses. My reasoning for this is pretty simple: I could either wait to start doing this ’til I’m really good at it, or I can start doing it now and get better on the job.
I decided that no matter what, I’m going to mostly be a beginner at first, and figure you’ll forgive the novice nature of my editing, not to mention the raw quality of the audio.
I guess, when it comes down to it, ten years of blogging has taught me to not be afraid of the “Publish” button.
A Note from Fatty: I realized some time ago that none of my kids read my blog. This, of course, makes me feel very, very sorry for myself. However, it also gives me the freedom to post something regarding them completely publicly, in spite of the fact that I do not want them to know this thing.
That thing is this: Next week, The Hammer and I are surprising the twins with an early Christmas present: a trip to Florida. Yes, that’s right. We’re telling them that we’re taking them to visit their grandma in St. George and to pack accordingly.
Our guess is that they won’t even notice anything’s up ’til we get to the airport. We’re very interested to find out exactly how long it takes them to figure out the full extent of what’s going on.
Anyway, from Monday through Wednesday, I will be posting only very short items (such as announcements of new podcasts) or no items at all, because we’ll be at Harry Potter World, among other places.
And now, she’s raced the 100 Miles of Nowhere. And before I let her tell her story, let me just say that I love the fact that she found it difficult, because it’s nice to know that hardcore racer types can have a tough day, just like the rest of us. And because Sarah’s so totally self-deprecating.
Enjoy!
100 Miles of Nowhere Race Report: Rookie Mistake Edition by Sarah Barber
SO….
Well, I thought I would be able to do 100 Miles of Nowhere this year, but I made a rookie mistake with my course selection.
In some ways, it was perfect. It passed right by my house, which you know is great for bathroom stops, clothing changes, filling bottles, etc. There’s not much traffic. There are only two stop signs, both of which can be rolled California style if no one is coming because they are at places where you turn right in order to stay on the course.
And speaking of turns, they are all right-had turns, except one, so you get really good at turning right. The course was an interesting loop because it has a climbing section, a descending section, and a flat section–something for everyone, and all in just 3.7 miles.
There’s even a “technical” corner–on the descent (so you’re going fast); there’s a slightly off-camber right-hand turn that had a bunch of leaves in the road, so it was potentially slick. Plus there were some manhole covers to dodge.
But the course selection was also my rookie mistake.
The climb was 352 feet. Not a big deal under most circumstances, but after 14 laps, you’ve climbed almost 5000 feet.
And even that is not a big deal in the middle of the summer. But in the middle of November, when I’m averaging about 3 hours of riding per week (and that’s in 3, maybe 4 rides), doing more than 3 hours in one day is kind of harsh.
Because of the climb (and because of my current level of fitness, to be fair), the loop was slow. Like 15-16 minutes. Which means I was averaging almost 15 mph.
So in 3:38, I had only covered 52.2 miles.
That’s when I broke.
I just didn’t have any desire to ride for 7 hours. It’s blustery and chilly here. There’s football on TV. And there’s always next year.
I consoled myself with a protein bar. It tasted like failure.
For what it’s worth, I learned enough from last year’s postings that I didn’t make other mistakes. I certainly didn’t try to ride fast! And I set up an aid station. If you look closely at the photos below, you’ll see that the bumper/brush guard of a Sportsmobile makes a perfect shelf for food and bottles.
Also, there’s a winch in case you get really tired and need some help getting home.
I don’t know if I deserve to be published on the blog since I only got through about half of the ride, but come on.
The whole thing is an ill-conceived notion, after all. ;-)
I am having a lot of fun with FattyCast, my new podcast. It’s a chance for me to do something new, which doesn’t happen all that often after ten (closer to eleven now) years of blogging. I’m talking with very interesting people. I’m hearing amazing stories. I’m learning a lot.
A Christmas Gift for You from Fatty: I am very lucky to have a lot of readers, and even more lucky to be able to think of all of you as my friends.
